#Real #Full #Monty #Jingle #Balls #review #Baring #charity.. #Burrell #butler #dragon #tattoo #writes #CHRISTOPHER #STEVENS
The Real Full Monty: Jingle Balls
Jamie’s Christmas Shortcuts
Such a noble tribute. Paul Burrell, former butler to Diana, Princess of Wales, has a tattoo supposedly in her honour — a dragon. On his left buttock. He says it’s a Welsh one.
We know, because it was on display from the opening shot of The Real Full Monty: Jingle Balls (ITV1), which saw celebs stripping off to raise awareness of cancer.
The Burrell botty was revealed repeatedly, in a gold lamé thong, a barbecue apron and a shop window. He couldn’t wait to show off his artwork, though the canvas itself was sagging somewhat.
Don’t worry if you missed it — part two of the show is on tonight, when it will receive much more exposure… and I’m sure Paul will send you a signed photo of it if you ask.
Burrell is known for ‘looking after’ some of Di’s dresses and hundreds of other items after her death, a generous deed that provoked some raised eyebrows until the late Queen confirmed that he’d informed her of his intentions.
![For the most part, The Real Full Monty on ITV1 was slow and struggled to fill a 90-minute slot](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2023/12/12/01/78842409-12852179-For_the_most_part_The_Real_Full_Monty_on_ITV1_was_slow_and_strug-a-21_1702344704541.jpg)
For the most part, The Real Full Monty on ITV1 was slow and struggled to fill a 90-minute slot
![Ashley Banjo is getting celebrities to take it all off on ITV1, with an on-stage striptease](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2023/12/12/01/78842415-12852179-Ashley_Banjo_is_getting_celebrities_to_take_it_all_off_on_ITV1_w-a-23_1702344713031.jpg)
Ashley Banjo is getting celebrities to take it all off on ITV1, with an on-stage striptease
![That very striptease ended with the male celebs and presenter Coleen Nolan posing naked in a department store window with some strategically placed Christmas decorations](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2023/12/12/01/78842411-12852179-That_very_striptease_ended_with_the_male_celebs_and_presenter_Co-a-25_1702344719730.jpg)
That very striptease ended with the male celebs and presenter Coleen Nolan posing naked in a department store window with some strategically placed Christmas decorations
But his impeccable reputation for honesty took another blow on the Full Monty, when the celebs were challenged to take the plunge in a freezing lake. ‘I can’t swim,’ Paul insisted, cowering in the boat.
That’s odd, because when he appeared on the Australian version of I’m A Celebrity five years ago, he made a point of saying how helpful fellow contestant Danny Green, an Olympic boxer, had been: ‘He taught me to swim, only doggy paddle, but he taught me to swim and he taught me to box.’
Burrell was prompted to bare all after being diagnosed with prostate cancer last year. Despite his devotion to Diana, he might not expect much support from her family: Di’s mother, Frances Shand Kydd, once said of him, ‘I hope his balls burn.’
Others braving the spotlight deserve more sympathy. Ex-footballer Ashley Cain lost his baby daughter to leukaemia, a tragedy so raw that he struggled to speak about it. When he did manage to talk, that brief segment gave meaning and value to the whole show.
For the most part, though, it was slow and struggled to fill a 90-minute slot. There was nothing to be learned from a ‘garden party’ at Gemma Collins’s house or the impromptu dance routines by drag queen Ella Vaday and former rugby player Ben Cohen.
The preparations for tonight’s on-stage striptease ended with the male celebs and presenter Coleen Nolan posing naked in a department store window with some strategically placed Christmas decorations. Among the baffled shoppers were families with children.
It’s one thing to disrobe for an audience, either live or on TV, who know what to expect. It’s something else entirely to inflict that on people who have nipped into town to pick up some last-minute presents.
![In Jamie Oliver's Channel 4 show Christmas Shortcuts, the recipes were an odd mix of the veggie and the carnivorous](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2023/12/12/01/78841699-12852179-in_Jamie_Oliver_s_Channel_4_show_Christmas_Shortcuts_the_recipes-a-18_1702344671286.jpg)
In Jamie Oliver’s Channel 4 show Christmas Shortcuts, the recipes were an odd mix of the veggie and the carnivorous
![His crispy roast potatoes looked mouth-watering, with Oliver using a generous amount of garlic](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2023/12/12/01/78841701-12852179-His_crispy_roast_potatoes_looked_mouth_watering_with_Oliver_usin-a-19_1702344671288.jpg)
His crispy roast potatoes looked mouth-watering, with Oliver using a generous amount of garlic
The once-Naked Chef Jamie Oliver was dispensing a few festive gifts, in the shape of his Christmas Shortcuts (Ch4), many of which involved red-hot clementines. As well as baking them and grating them into butter, he recommended microwaving one for 90 seconds until it boils in its own skin. I think I’ll just leave mine in the toe of Santa’s stocking, thanks.
The recipes were an odd mix of the veggie and the carnivorous. There was a cheesy leek sauce served in a baked pumpkin, which seems more Halloween than Christmas. But Jamie also waved a turkey gizzard at the camera, urging us to, ’embrace the giblets’.
His crispy roast potatoes looked mouth-watering, though. And he was merciless with the garlic. ‘Give it a little spank, like that,’ he declared, smashing a clove with the heel of his hand. Don’t try that with a molten clementine.