If emotional manipulation was an Olympic sport, then Norwegian skier Sturla Holm Laegreid would be the bookies’ favourite to win gold.

Unfortunately for him, the International Olympic Committee is yet to formalise guilt-tripping as a sporting activity, so he’ll have to make do with the piddling bronze medal he won earlier this week in the men’s 20km individual biathlon race at the Winter Olympics.

The 28-year-old’s performance on the slopes secured him a spot on the podium in Milan. But it was during his post-race TV interview that things really started to go downhill.

‘There’s someone I wanted to share this with who might not be watching,’ he said. ‘Six months ago, I met the love of my life – the most beautiful and kindest person in the world. Three months ago I made my biggest mistake and cheated on her.’

Weeping openly, Laegreid reduced most viewers to tears of frustration as he made the kind of corny appeal that might have worked in a cheesy rom-com from the noughties, but doesn’t quite hold up to the rigorous moral dating standards of 2026.

‘I had the gold medal in life,’ he added, slaloming wildly past the obstacles he seemed intent on laying for himself. ‘I only have eyes for her. I wish I could share it with her.’

Laegreid may claim ignorance as to why he has been so public about his emotions, but any woman who’s had the misfortune of dating a cheating narcissist will be able to tell him exactly what he was doing: playing the victim to elicit sympathy. 

It’s self-exculpatory behaviour of the worst kind and a classic tactic from an emotionally immature human: behave badly, then make out you’ve been wronged. I am reminded of the boyfriend who admitted to me that he ended up in a clinch with an ex because he was ‘having a hard time at work’.

Our columnist is reminded of a boyfriend who admitted to her that he ended up in a clinch with an ex because he was ‘having a hard time at work’

When I refused to feel sorry for him – there were, after all, other options open to him, like speaking to HR, or a therapist, or even me, his girlfriend – he sulkily told me he didn’t think I was the right person for him. I was a bit too judgmental, he said, before I led him to the door.

We’ve all had partners like this, the ones who genuinely believe that admitting their poor behaviour somehow exonerates them of it.

‘I wanted to be honest with you,’ they will say, with all the emotional integrity of a politician who’s been caught doing business with a criminal. Then they ‘tearfully’ admit they’ve spent every Wednesday afternoon for the past six months getting naked with Kelly from accounts at the Travelodge. What do they expect for their brave ‘honesty’? Some sort of Olympic medal?

People make mistakes, of course. But in my experience, you can tell a genuinely remorseful pillock who’s had a lapse of judgment from a man who will never change, because when they apologise, they don’t tend to do it in public, in a way that is highly embarrassing to you. This gives you the option to forgive them without everyone knowing you got back together with a cheating bastard.

The Norwegian skier (not a euphemism) has since released a statement saying he ‘deeply regrets’ bringing up the story – though at no point in the last few days has he apologised to the woman he claims to have loved so very much that he cheated on her after only three months.

Indeed, it’s clear the only thing Laegreid is actually sorry for is the fact his public declaration didn’t go down quite as well as he thought it would. Because despite his statement, he admitted hours earlier he had planned what he was going to say before.

Norwegian skier Sturla Holm Lægreid with his bronze medals at the Winter Olympics

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‘Last night I had a kind of revelation that I should drop this bomb,’ he admitted at a press conference. ‘Then we’ll see what happens. I have nothing to lose.’

And there, in two chillingly dispassionate sentences, we see how Laegreid managed to transform himself from a Norwegian Olympic hero to the internet’s biggest pantomime villain.

‘Stop giving men microphones,’ said one person on social media.

Meanwhile, Laegreid moaned that it had ‘been the worst week of my life’, scoring a perfect ten in the Olympic discipline of (toe)curling confessions.

It’s probably not been a top week for your ex-girlfriend either, Sturla, and I doubt it’s been made any better by this public declaration of self-pity (‘I have not asked to be put in this position and it is hard to be there,’ responded the anonymous ex afterwards. ‘We have had contact and he is aware of my opinions.’).

What was he thinking? Did Sturla believe becoming an Olympian would somehow persuade her to forgive him? If so, he was very much mistaken. Because while he may be a bronze medallist, he’s managed to prove that he’s also a walking, talking, skiing red flag.

Margot Robbie in Leicester Square at the premiere of her new film Wuthering Heights 

I’ve  often felt a strong affinity with actress Margot Robbie – no, not because of her devastating beauty, or her incredible talent, but because she, too, was once fond of cheesy London nightclub Infernos.

Robbie explained on a podcast that the legendary Clapham venue is almost impossible to get kicked out of, and yet she managed it when she lived in the area many years ago… Same, Margot, same!

Thank goodness a tribunal judge has ruled that it isn’t harassment to ask a female colleague if she is going through the menopause.

A woman sued her manager after he asked if she was ‘going through the change’ – but it was found not to be ‘inherently offensive’. 

As the drop in hormones often caused by the menopause can stimulate speaking the truth, I’d argue it’s a superpower in the office.

Claudia Winkleman is set to join the presenting team of Crufts on Channel 4 from March

First, she got me to watch a programme about ballroom dancing. Then, she had me hooked on a reality show where strangers pretend to murder each other.

Now, Claudia Winkleman’s latest presenting gig has been announced, and it turns out I’m going to be spending the beginning of March watching her host the coverage from Crufts on Channel 4.

I’m not a dog person… but I am a Claudia person, and wherever she goes, I will dutifully follow, like a pet labrador.

A new study from the University of Birmingham has found many schools are spending more than 100 hours a week managing pupil phone use – that’s the equivalent of 3.1 staff members using every working moment to police phone policies.

Is this what we want teachers to be wasting their time on? Smartphones, and the social media apps on them, are not keeping our children any safer, and they’re certainly not making them smarter. 

The quicker the Government gets on with imposing a blanket ban on social media for under-16s, the better.